I’m waiting in anticipation, is he lying or am i a fool? To be sad and hurt and mad and tired at the same time is a hell all on it’s own. Heartache you don’t want is the worst kind, when you don’t have the time and energy to be on the edge anymore, wiating for that moment, that moment when your heart is shattered, all the while it’s already breaking, because you know, every breath is a farce and every word is a collosal lie.
Years, the best years, wasted, infected with hatred and darkness, it rains almost everyday, but i watch the light, i keep watching the light. Honesty is so amazing, when you’re honest no one can really fault you, even when you make mistakes, it’s imparitive that you admit your wrongs, but maintaining a lie and wasting someones time, uines their whole life. What could be worse than that? yes many things, but giving your life just for someone to waste it, it’s maddening, more than.
If this is my fate, i’ll live it, i’ve been living it, but i refuse to accept it. I have grown to hate and that is an hell in itself, i never had that ability, now i do and it’s a lot of work. Life is not fun or fair, but waiting in anticipation for the big one, the day everything i thought should be mine is given to someone else, there would be no glory in ‘I knew it all along’ just a deafening pain, a heartless vessel. Theres a big difference in knowing something and being right about it, denile.